What’s Not to Love at the Dentist?

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You know how you can tell this is not me at the dentist?  My hands aren’t in the picture and the nostrils aren’t flared nearly enough.  Yes, you guessed it, I went to my friendly dental establishment today…. just for a cleaning.  Well, as my sister and I both whole heartily know, levitation is possible just from a simple cleaning.  I think there is red warning tape tied around my file that says “Hyper Sensitive Wimp”on it to protect the hygienist from bodily harm.  Yes,  I have a few highly sensitive teeth.  No, there is absolutely no reason to spray cold water on them to check if they are still sensitive.  No, there is absolutely no reason to shoot cold air on them to check if they are still sensitive.  THEY ARE!  I’m just saying.

Over my sensitive years, I’ve learned to brush my teeth with warm water.  If I drink cold water my tongue naturally shields my upper left molars without me reminding it. And ice cream can bring me to tears.  It’s not just the frigid temperatures…. it’s hot too.  Hot soup, hot pizza, hot lasagna.  All must be blown on with tender care before inserting near the upper left quadrant.

So today, my tooth doctor, whose name is for really Montana Skylar, (sounds like he should be on a dusty horse roping cattle in tight Levis) comes up with a suggestion that I’ve never heard before for my tender teeth.  It’s called tooth varnish.  So I say, “YES! ANYTHING!  BRING IT ON!”  And for only $457 I can be sensitive free!  (just kidding, I was checking if my hubby still reads my blog.)  Anywhooo, I am currently sitting here typing with a mouth full of wax coating my teeth.  It feels like I just ate a bee hive.  It’s pasty white and filmy and Larisa says it makes me lisp.  WHO CARES!?!?  I might be able to bite into a Mint Filled Dilly Bar without spilling tears.  I’m not to have anything hot until tomorrow and I’m not supposed to brush my teeth until tomorrow morning.  That’s a first.  The dentist telling you to skip brushing.  I’ll report in when I’m wax free as to my level of sensitivity.  Pray that this wasn’t a scam.

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5 Responses to “What’s Not to Love at the Dentist?”

  1. Jennie C. Says:

    It’s not a scam. I do it. It helps. But it doesn’t work miracles. And I still brush with Sensodyne, too.

  2. Grumps Says:

    lINDA – i ENJOYED YOUR STORY OF YOUR TRIP TO THE DENTIST. i, FOR ONE, AM NOT AFRAID TO GO TO THE DENTIST i CAN PROVE THAT STATEMENT. ON ONE OF MY TRIPS TO THE DENTIST, i FELL ASLEEP IN THE DENTIST CHAIR AND BIT THE CHAIR SIDE ASSISTANT. SHE SAID
    “OUCH” AND IMMEDIATELY TOOK HER BUSY HAND OUT OF MY MOUTH.
    THE DENTIST SAID, “GOOD.” LOVE, GRAM

  3. rixgal Says:

    I need to go get some more Sensodyne too.

    Gram, You’re the first person I’ve ever heard who has fallen asleep while someone is working in their mouth! I’m sure you gave them a good scare.

    I’ve fallen asleep in the chair, but only because of waiting so long with no one in the room.

  4. The Informal Matriarch Says:

    You need our mommy to clean your teeth, she’s the most gentle and most wonderfullest hygienist in the entire universe. Even her needles don’t hurt. And she gives nice hugs when you start crying because you have a cavity.

  5. rixgal Says:

    Leah, I’ve thought of your mom while sitting in my dentist’s chair. Wish she lived a bit closer.

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