Address, please? (Vol. 3)

Today I called our bank to report a $12 service fee that should not be charged to our account. Seems there was a slight change to the checking account requirement for free banking… and I slipped outside those newly established parameters. Great. Merry Christmas to you too, Mr. Bank Employee.

However, before I learned all the newfangled rules, I had to verify my account. Please see THIS BLOG to reminisce with me how well I do at verifying my bank accounts. I’m a rock star with security questions!

The kind man asked for my address including zip code. I rattled off the address where we have lived for the past 10 1/2 years with the speed of a live steer auctioneer. (Not a dead steer auctioneer.)

“Mrs. Crosby, that is not the address we have on file for your accounts.” Of course it’s not. NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! Say it isn’t so. Remember, I called the bank in September to fix the address so my son could purchase airline tickets……. and he bought the tickets, has made the trip to Canada and was back home safely months ago.

Once again, I explained the inadvertent address change. He was happy to assist me with correcting the address on my accounts I just had to … (wait for it)….  answer some security questions. Of course I did. The new twist was that it was electronic and all the answers were numbers that I could enter on my phone. How hard could that be?

Really hard if you are still in debit card purgatory and now also address change hell. Let me tell you. I got the very first, initial, introductory, inaugural, primary and opening answer wrong. Do you know the last four digits of your spouse’s social security number? Me neither! There was no “best-out-of-five” this time. Why didn’t they ask for MY last four digits???

“I’m sorry, Mrs. Crosby, but the system did not register a correct answer. You are now locked out of the system for 24 hours before you can try again to verify the account so we can correct the address.” You know, after five months, what’s another 24 hours? That’s assuming I will be granted immunity tomorrow.

Thank you, Mr. Bank Employee. Merry Christmas to you and your family! Cheers! Happy New Year and the Year of the Monkey! Happy Hanukkah too! Ciao!

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