Nine More Days

My husband of 25.5 years and myself will leave our home on January 4, 2013 with a van stuffed full of college paraphernalia and our firstborn child…. to just drop her off in Oklahoma and run for the border.  It’s a first for our family.  Children leaving the nest.  Much preparation, turmoil, tears and rejoicing have gone into this event.  Way more turmoil than I originally anticipated for a college departure.

There are nine more days to teach her everything she needs to know for infinity and beyond.  That is the key right there that keeps me from losing it… again.  Infinity and beyond is what really matters.  Kingdom thinking.  Have we prepared our daughter (the one who once asked for scotch tape and a box of envelopes for Christmas) to love God and serve people?  That people are more important than things?  To build others up and give a helping hand?

Yes, she plowed through algebra and ancient world history… but that is knowledge and not necessarily wisdom.  Wisdom is what matters in life.  Proverbs says that we should seek after wisdom and that it is found in those who take advice.  And wisdom will save you from the ways of wicked men.

Yes, she can effectively run a household, hold down a job and save money… but it is her heart that matters.  Getting to this point with child number one has helped me focus with children numbers 2,3 and 4.  They will also make it through algebra and ancient world history… but I need to be an example of love to them no matter the circumstances.

My firstborn daughter and I watched Les Miserables in the theater in Mission, B.C., Canada last night.  My favorite line was “To love another person is to see the face of God.”  A GREAT movie to see before heading off to college.

(I can do this. I can do this.  I can do this.)

It’s TRUE!

That ago old adage that I’ve heard since birth uttered from parents, “This is going to hurt me more than it hurts you” IS TRUE!  Be warned.  Be afraid.  Be very afraid.  Parenting is not easy, but it is worth it 27 gazillion times more than the pain it brings.  Yesterday was the first time I lived through “this is going to hurt me more than it hurts you” from the parenting side of the equation.  Details need to be kept to a minimum, but a HUGE decision was made by my husband and myself that not only affects one of our children, but is one of those examples to all of our children who will remember forever, “When mom and dad ask you to do something… they mean it.”

I think I cried more than the child did.  My husband called a couple of times throughout the day and asked, “How are you doing?” not how is the child doing.  The child will be fine… and stronger for it, we hope.  I was a mess.  I always want to be known as the dream builder, not the dream crusher…. but sometimes when we see discrepancies between what we have taught and how the child is behaving…. dreams have to be put on hold.  We have to go in reverse for a bit and re-learn a few character issues that were obviously taken too lightly.  Delay is not denial… I learned that from my baby sister.  It applies here.  Delay is also dumb when we are not getting our own way… which leads us back to character issues AGAIN.

This reminds me of when my mother, in a flustered and frustrated situation, would tell us, “Go to your room and holds hands with yourself.”  When I became a mother, I completely understood the meaning of that.  I changed it up a bit for the next generation and have been known to relay loudly, “Go to your room and pray to Jesus that He makes you nice.  And don’t come out until He does.”  It’s all good.

It’s all about character.  How you behave when no one is watching is KEY.  Priorities are KEY. Being obedient is KEY.  Not just for our kids, but for all of us.  Blessing follows obedience…. every stinkin’ time.  God is so good.