It’s a Mother’s Day CONTEST!!!!

Come one.  Come all.  Step right up and enter to win a GRAND PRIZE for you or a mother dear to your heart this Mother’s Day.

What would every mother want?  A diamond ring?  No. (Could get lost while playing in the sand at the park!) A new MiniVan!  No. (Take it from my experience, after you hit someone in a minivan, they are not that great any more!)  A dozen roses! No (They wilt in no time, especially if you bought them at Walmart!)

Maybe something to bring joy to her heart.  Something to make her laugh…. and snort… and laugh some more!  Yes, you guessed it!  A Book!  YES!

Yes, a FREE autographed copy of my book Laughing in the Midst of Mothering!  Every mother you know needs a laugh!  This book can be yours (for your mom if you aren’t a mom) by merely entering your name in the comments section of this blog.

You have until May 5th midnight to enter.  On May 6th, after I sleep in, I will randomly draw one name from the list and announce the winner here on MSJ.  I will blast the name for all to see.  The winner will have 24 hours to contact me with an address for where to ship the book.  If person #1 doesn’t contact me, I will draw another name on May 7th.  :o)

I love AAA

Yes, it’s true.  I appeared in public with foils on my head.  Yes, that is the AAA tow truck with lights flashing.  Yes, these two things would only happen simultaneously to ME!

Today started out like any other ordinary day…  we homeschooled; I dropped Keeve off for band; I finally went to the Social Security Administration to apply for Nora’s SS number (and they only printed it incorrectly once… that’s not bad); I picked up a refund check at the doctor’s office; I bought a few gifts at Target and then went to get my hair colored and cut.

Lo and behold, in between Target and the salon, I realized my front tire was flat.  Not just super low, FLAT.  Knowing that a color/cut takes an hour, I called AAA, knowing also that the tow truck driver NEVER arrives in less than an hour.  The timing was perfect in my little head.  As the picture shows…. it didn’t exactly turn out that way.  This was the fastest tow truck driver on the planet.  TWENTY minutes!  That’s it!  Just as the last foil went in, my cell phone rang, “I’m here!”  Oh brother…. and out into the warm afternoon I went, somewhat humiliated and embarrassed.

We are not putting one slim dime into this van with the flat tire.  My dear husband has tomorrow off work so we can go get a newer van and trade in this one.  It has over 220,000 miles and has served us well.  But right now it needs new shocks, new tires and the transmission changes gears randomly while driving, so that probably needs to be replaced as well.  I said all that to say, the tow truck driver got out the spare…. that has a bulge in it.  He put it on, but wouldn’t let me drive the van.  It wasn’t safe.  At all.  So he towed the van with the bulgy tire to our home 7 miles away…. and I stayed to get a shampoo, cut and style.

My husband was supposed to be passing by this area on the way home from work in about twenty minutes, so I called him and asked him to pick me up.  That sounds all well and good too, but there was a huge accident on the freeway and it took Rick 1 hr and 10 minutes to get to me.  “Frazzled” doesn’t quite do justice to my state of mind when he finally arrived.  I think he may have been going to ask me if I wanted to go to the movies…. but one look at me and he didn’t.  :o)  Wise man, my husband.

So, FYI: next time you schedule your hair appointment, don’t call AAA at the beginning of the procedure.

First Time EVER!

(Image scraplifted from: http://kellishouse.blogspot.com/2009/07/handmade-card-tutorial_30.html )

Yes, it’s that time of year again…. Scrapping in the Pines, our bi-annual scrapbooking retreat for four days in the cool pine-covered mountains of Prescott, Arizona.  There are seven of us going….. but this time I’m packing GAMES!  Yes, you read that right… GAMES!  Yahtzee, Settlers of Catan, Ticket to Ride, 13 and Carcasonne!  We’ve never played games in Prescott! And movies, but we always take movies!

AND… please make sure you’re seated for this announcement… I’m not scrapbooking at Scrapping in the Pines!  I know!  Unbelievable.  I am making cards this trip.  I’m always a bit envious of my sister’s beautiful handmade cards that arrive in our mailbox several times a year.  Mine are usually handmade by a little Asian woman and purchased in a big box at Costco.  But after my third box of that type…. I have LOTS of baby and sympathy cards… but I’m fresh out of birthday cards … AGAIN  Enough! 

I scooted into Barnes & Noble tonight and bought a card making magazine….it cost as much as buying five cards at Hallmark, but it will be worth it’s weight in gold when I’m done.  All of my scrapping patterned paper, ribbons, buttons, eyelets, lace, trim, glitter, flowers and such will be making the journey.  Along with blank cards and envelopes.  I also resurrected the stamps, ink, embossing glitter, heat gun, and the metal embossing template!  What a blast from the past!  WAIT!  Inspiration just struck at this very moment… and you’re here to witness it first hand…. I can MAKE the envelopes!  Oh, sweet mother of baby Jesus, that is a great idea.  My aviator husband has all kinds of maps that will be perfect.  YES!

And so, it will be the first time EVER that this retreat should REALLY be called “Relaxing, Gaming and Crafting in the Pines.”  But we’re not changing the name after 15 years!

In My Absence

The lack of blogging is due to a disturbance in the force.  We went camping and didn’t take the computer…. go figure!  Four families made some plans, reserved some camp spots, packed everything including the kitchen sink (but all forgot ketchup!) and headed out to the lake for four days of wilderness survival.  It was hardly wildernessy or survivally, except for the hurricane that hit with 65 mile-an-hour winds on Friday night.  The boy’s tent blew down flat… broken poles and all.  Two of them moved into the boat (with a canvas cover) and two moved into the van.  Let me just add that the wise man builds his house in the van.  By 12:30 a.m. the boat boys were soaked and texted a plea to the RV, “Please help. Wet.”

Our tent was not handling the gales well either.  A nylon strap snapped and rain was coming in on my head….. I was more worried about getting electrocuted from my electric blanket than worried about being wet.  Don’t judge me.  We also were graciously invited into the 5th wheel in the blowing blazes of the storm.

If the storm wasn’t enough, Keeve’s retainer went missing AGAIN.  This is the second camping trip where the retainer was MIA.  Thankfully it was also the second camping trip where the retainer materialized before his father could wring his neck.

AND…. our friend’s golden retriever was profusely sprayed by our neighborhood skunk.  I’ve smelled city kitties before, but not so strong where it burns your throat.  Wow…. brought tears to my eyes as well.

If all those events didn’t add enough excitement…. our car battery died…. deader than a doornail.  So we used the van as a storage unit until my knight in shining work truck went a bought a new battery.  Wow!

Yes, the water level is extremely low in Lake Pleasant at the moment, but it is filling as we speak.  Many a nap transpired by the lake and we ALL enjoyed the lazy time of not being in the hustle and bustle of home life.

Despite the disturbances in the force, a relaxing time was had by all…. most of the time.

AHA

Hi.  My name is Linda and I’m an American-History-Aholic.  You know, every nerd has their area of passion…. mine just happens to be history.  Seriously, a National Park or Historical Marker sign on the highway causes whiplash in our vehicle if I’m driving.  There is simply too much good information to pass up one of those!  You never know when you might get a Trivial Pursuit question about Wilson’s Creek Battle in southwestern Missouri!  I’m ready, baby.

This year, as you may know if you have read MSJ in the past few months, I’m teaching American History to a group of homeschool nerds students. Even if they are not loving it, I am.  And I know they are learning something from my sheer enthusiasm!  I decided not to be the hard-core teacher that I’ve been in the past.  I figure, any way to get the information into the kids’ heads is good…. whether conventional or not.  I.e., I give quizzes each week on all of the assignments from the previous week.  It is a small percentage of the actual information that is tested.  And there is LOTS of information to cover in a week.  So I devised a plan to make the tests easier.  First if there are 54 or 63 questions on the test, I round down to score out of 50 or 60.  How nice of me. Next I made a set of 15 5×7 notecards that tell the students how much help they get on the test.  One card is drawn each day.  They say things like:  “Phone a friend… seriously with a phone.”  or “Ask the expert.” (That’s me) and all of the kids in the class can listen to the answer.  Another is “Work together.”  And “You may use your textbooks.”  And “Do every other question” and “Skip one section.”  See, easy-peasy.

Today they drew the card that said they could each phone two friends.  I told them if they considered me a friend, they could text me.  Three of them did.  haha.  My daughter asked for one of my friend’s phone numbers.  This is another homeschool mom in California.  The question was ‘What is a chandler?’  Lucky for my girl, the mom was on her computer and googled it for her.  I figure….. it’s all good.  Will my daughter know what a chandler is for the rest of her life?  Yes.  For those not near a computer, it’s a person who made candles.  (haha… get it…. not by a computer!)

Anyway, my students are all doing well in the class and I’m having fun.  Isn’t that what it’s all about?????

Cuteness in the Backyard!

When I first laid eyes on this idea in a magazine, I was sold.  It’s been about two years since I ripped that page right out of that magazine…. and put it in my Idea Binder.  I’ve been waiting for the right chair ever since.  Several prerequisites for the chair were established in my mind: sturdy, wide seat, easily removable seat and CUTE!  The one in the magazine was an old ladder back chair with straight lines and no frills.

Fast forward to 8:45 pm on the Friday night before the 50% off sale day at Goodwill.  I was preshopping the sale for the next day with my husband by my side.  I spied this chair and my heart pitter-pattered a little faster than usual.  I knew it was MY chair for the flower pot idea.  It had a cane seat and darling flowers carved on the legs, seat and back.  The cane had a tear in it… hence the $6 price.

That night Larisa had her friend Sarah sleeping over and I talked them into going with me to Goodwill in the morning…. to stand in line so as to be ready for the mad dash.  As we waited in line, I explained everyone’s role: Larisa was to take Nora, get a cart and head for electronics. (That is where I hid small stuff.)  Sarah was to go directly to furniture, grab the chair and head for electronics.  I explained the chair in detail, so as not to get the wrong chair.  I was bee-lining to electronics.  I told them that as soon as the doors open, there would be an announcement over the loud speaker that says “Please do not run!” I confirmed, “Do not listen to it! … RUN!”

All went as planned and now I have a pretty potted chair in the backyard!

For those DIY-ers, I cut out the cain seat.  Painted the brown chair white.  Sanded the decorative carvings. Then I stapled chicken wire to the bottom of the frame in the shape of a bowl.  I bought one of those basket liner replacements that are an inch thick and made of coconut hair.  I had to cut some triangles out of the edges to get it to fit in the seat.  I wanted it on the patio, but it will drip everytime I water it, so it is on the rocky border next to the patio.  TA DA!

The Circus Came to Town

We just wrapped up a one week unit on Fun.  Yes, you read that right.  FUN.  This is why we homeschool.  Because we can spend a week studying FUN!  Last night was the biggest FUN of all…. the kids put on a circus, complete with a Ring Master, clowns, jugglers, a tumbler, dog tricks, a princess on a bike, a snake charmer, a kickboxing dog and more!  We ate popcorn, peanuts, cotton candy and hot dogs!  YES!   F  U  N!  Here are some blurry nighttime pictures to prove that we do school. 

The only joke book the clowns found was a Canadian joke book, so the humor had a Northern slant.  But my favorite, hands down, was the knock knock joke that was told backwards.  The “orange you glad I didn’t say banana” started with the orange instead of the banana.  Too funny.  Great job, kids!

Earth Day (well, sort of)

We finally got to the theater to see the movie Earth…. with my keys firmly in my hot little hand.  The movie was not what I expected, but the photography was amazing.  My four year old nephew was with his family, who was with us, and he made it quite entertaining, as most four year olds would.  His mother and I thought the chase scenes and shark-eating-seal scenes might be a bit to dramatic for him.  Not so.  We looked over at him as a cheetah caught a deer and his eyes were as big as saucers and he said under his breath, to no one in particular, “Awwwwwesooooome!”  So much for the timid little, soft-hearted four year old.

The boys said that they would rather see another movie.  Homeschool mom said, “This is school.  We can stay home and do more math, or go see Earth.”  They decided Earth was now viewer worthy.  A friend on facebook suggested X-men instead of Earth.  I explained that this was SCHOOL.  He suggested I call it Culinary Arts….  oh boy.

I’m looking forward to the flick UP!  It looks hilarious and Pixar always puts on a really good shew.

Word Problems

Math word problems can be complicated enough without throwing the homeschool curve on a fourth grader.  Keeve was sitting in the kitchen doing his math today… estimating and measuring lengths in inches, feet and yards.  He seemed to be staring out the back door quite often… sometimes this means he’s thinking.  Sometimes it means he’s mentally checked-out.  I asked if he understood what he was doing and if he needed help.  After blowing out a long exasperated breath he said, “Is the kitchen table my desk?”  “Yes, son, today it’s your desk.”  Some guessing transpired along with some measuring.  Then he retrieved the measuring tape from the pantry and was moving it around and around on the kitchen floor and into the family room and hall.  I asked if he needed help again.  He replied, “Where does my classroom start and stop?  Is the family room my classroom too?”  Oh, the struggles of homeschooling.  Nothing cut and dry here on the home front.

This morning I caught my eldest son counting aloud days on the calendar.  Just when he was nearing the end of the teens I announced loudly, “Nineteen!”  He was a bit surprised that I knew EXACTLY how many more days of school we have.  Well, duh.  It’s my summer holiday too.  :o)

Thankfully I found a DVD on Galileo for this afternoon.  Whew.  Remember how much YOU loved movie day at school!?!

? # 21 From My Sister’s Jar – A Day of FUN!

Yes, it’s been almost a year since I started pulling questions from My Sister’s Jar.  And yes, I’m only on 21… sad but true.  For posterity, I dusted off the jar and pulled one out for today.

If you dedicated an entire day to “fun,” what would you do?

It would definitely be a “girls day out” with either my sister or a close friend.  It would start with a pedicure (hot pink of course, with bling bling) while sipping Starbucks.  Then we would go for a late breakfast at Paradise Bakery, but not so late that we miss the breakfast menu.  I hate it when that happens.  They have the best breaky foods… quiche and fruit and croissants with ham and cream cheese.  Next, we would take in a girly flick at the new Harkins by our house.  That theater is beautiful!  After laughing and crying and laughing and crying during the movie, we would head off for a bit of purse and/or jewelry shopping at Steinmart.  I love that store.  It’s the mother ship of bling bling and fancy shmancy purses.  Obviously the original home of my cute orange purse with the leather circles. 

Next is a hard one, because I would want to spend a couple hours in a ultra-fabulous scrapbooking store picking out a cute acrylic album and all the ribbons, paper, buttons and cha-ching that match.  However, our fabuloso store closed.  I need to research the current stores to see if I can find a suitable replacement.  My sister and I did just do a run on Scrapbooks, Etc. in Mesa, but they just don’t display stuff that makes you drool and SPEND.  Anyway, the evening would be wrapped up with take-out from PF Chang’s and a pajama clad night of scrapping at home with Harry Connick Jr. music serenading us into creativity and frivolity.

Any takers???