I’m Not Pushing Up Daisies

In case you thought I ran off and died, or something, I didn’t.  I’m not dead.  It is simply NEVER a dull moment around here… not that it needs to be dull to blog… but seriously, I blinked and eight days flew by. 

Nothing out of the ordinary, other than my brave, strong and sore husband hiked the Grand Canyon last weekend…. in rain and sleet and even snow.  C-R-A-Z-Y… totally.  A clue to the weather conditions may have been the closed highway leading to the canyon… but NOOOOOOOOOO!  The 17 C-R-A-Z-Y men found an alternative route and kept right on going.  Instead of a leisurely three and a half hour drive it was EIGHT hours. Yes, the following photos were all taken in Arizona. 

(photo courtesy of Barnabas Moses… who also didn’t put in his deposit for next year.)

After the delayed drive, the need arose to take the FAST five mile trail to the bottom, to beat sundown.  As if hiking the Grand Canyon in rain and sleet and even snow wasn’t bad enough….. imagine it in the dark!  It continued to snow the entire next day while the men rested at Phantom Ranch… and the next day as well…. providing fun five foot tall snowdrifts across the trail on the way out… that could only be passed on their hands and knees.  But I digress.

(photo courtesy of Andy Leebrick… not sure if he put in his deposit.)  Notice the bottom left corner for more hikers on the switchback trail.  I think Rick is the mostly blue person in the number four spot… but I’m not sure.

Rick is back home.  He’s mostly fine, but he did walk funny for a few painfully slow days.  He did not put his deposit in to hold his spot next year.  Hmmmmmmmmmm.  He said it was the hardest thing he’s ever done in his life.  Hence, the tight-fisted deposit money still in his tightfist.

Cactus in snow is just wrong.  Wrong. Wrong. Wrong. Wrong. Wrong.

P.S.  I’ll have pictures SOON of Zaza’s tea table and chairs!!!!  I’ve been a busy bee painting them!

“Yes, M’am, I’m In a Safe Location”

Remember a few weeks back when my week was brought to you by the number 2?  Two flat tires…. two cars…   well, it was actually 5, yes F-I-V-E flat tires over a period of five weeks on our two cars.  The final one (I hope) was last week when I arrived at Keeve’s hockey practice.  I hopped out of the van to hear and watch the rear tire go flat in 15 seconds.  Quicker than usual, I thought. 

I called Rick and he confirmed that I should call AAA.  Believe me when I say that AAA is not making ANY money off of the Crosbys!  I’m so familiar with the drill that I save the AAA operator considerable time by answering her questions IN ORDER before she asks them.  “Hello, I am in a safe location.  I have a flat tire on my 2005 silver Dodge Caravan.  Here is my membership number and my cell phone number.” 

And you know things are not going exactly peachy when the AAA driver’s first words are, “Hey, I recognize you!”  Yeah, yeah, smarty pants, just fix the tire.  Not long afterward he added, “Good thing you got a full size spare!”  I wasn’t quite sure how to take that??? 

Seems there was a large crack in the tire.  Rick asked if I hit a curb or something bigger. I refrained from saying “You mean like the metal beam by your parking spot at the airport?”….. which he rubbed up against .  I’m slowly learning to be such a NICE wife.  It’s only taken me 21.4 years.

The needing-attention-flat tire in the back of the van has become so common place now, I keep a towel in the van to lay it on and I just stack the groceries on top of it…. and the hockey bags… and Jill’s card table for Bunko night.

All this does make my heart glad, however, for not long ago in a dire, out-of-town roadside situation I called AAA to discover that my sweet, economical husband had removed my name from the coverage plan.  What was he thinking?  I think I might just remove him from the laundry plan.  Before the shock wore off, I called Rick to see if the AAA lady was credible.  It was true.  Am I not worthy of roadside coverage???  His explanation, weak as it was, included illogical logic that I drive the reliable vehicle and HE is the only one who truly needs roadside assistance.  I don’t exactly remember my response to Rick at that moment. He probably does.  Kind of like when I mentally blocked the horror of my semi-Dorothy Hamill haircut in the 70s.  But within the hour, I had the AAA gold-package coverage and have used it at least four times since that memorable day.

Thank you, Honey, for taking care of me.

The Evolution of Cars

Our kids never laid eyes on our long list of beasts of burden until tonight.  We had family togetherness time… around the computer with google images… so they could see with their own eyes our cool rides.  Hence, a blog tribute to coincide with this evening’s theme.  Fasten your seat belts.  We usually had two vehicles, and we prided ourselves on replacing the oldest one with a car at least ten years newer.  Thank God that’s over.

(Wrong year and wrong color, but close!)

The 1971 Toyota Corona Deluxe, aka: White Sheba.  Right before we were married we bought this car from my dad when it had over 200,000 miles on it (or was it 300,000??)…. but it had FACTORY air conditioning… rare indeed.  White Sheba’s license plate was personalized with my maiden name (minus a vowel) NIKANDR.  Rick and I were stopped at the US border once and the border patrol stuck his head out of his box when we pulled up and asked with raised eyebrows, “Nick and Doreen, right?”  We didn’t think of the plate and answered in confusion, “No, Rick and Linda????”

 (Rick’s was white but didn’t have numbers.)

The 1975 Dodge Colt was Rick’s first car… AND the car he impressed me with (WHAT was I thinking??..  this proves that love is blind.. and dumb.)  What I remember distinctly about this ride was its name “The Mold Mobile” due to the 2L of pop that poured out in the passenger side carpet… and somehow grew mold on the passenger seat belt (which I refused to touch or wear.)  When the headlights were being utilized the heater wasn’t functional.  So Rick would drive until he was frozen, then pull over and sit in the dark until the interior warmed up.  What fun!

The 1981 Chevy Van… it served its purpose, ok?!  The paint job was almost identical to this one, but we had major rust spots making it a three-tone paint job.  This beauty was christened The Party Van, for obvious reasons:  it had tri-colored shag carpet on the floor AND ceiling, tasteful wood paneled cabinetry, tweed upholstery and groovy orange lights all around the ceiling inside.  Rick bought this van when I wasn’t looking. 

The 1979 Ford Mustang.  OK, it would seem that Rick was cool with this car, but the color could only be classified as FLESH.  It was so ugly, I always felt half naked driving it, like all my skin was exposed.  I guess that would be fully naked, wouldn’t it?  This is the second car we owned when we were wed.  It had matching flesh colored seats with large patterned black and tan hounds-tooth fabric.  It was a 70’s wonder.

There were many more, but I’ll save those for another memorable blog. 

www.LindaCrosby.com

Roadway Glamour Shots

Confession time again.  I received a speeding ticket for driving 48 mph in a 25 zone… in my dad’s 1966 shiny red Mustang.  It’s hard NOT to speed in that car, but at least the officer was cordial.  I did the crime and I paid my time in traffic school.  The instructor surprised me with the content of the class, where about 25% of my valuable time was spent hearing about how photo radar tickets are usually bunk.  He described how they are illegally taken from private property, how a signature is required to profess guilt and how the photos usually aren’t clear enough to prove the identity of the driver.  Being a lover of safety rules, I had a hard time with this, as you can imagine…. not the photo radar, but the instructor freely sharing the information on the city’s dime.

It was late at night when I arrived home after my graduation from traffic school and Rick, my dear husband, was giving me a hard time about breaking the law.  He was opening the mail as he harassed me…. and suddenly grew silent.  He was staring at a letter so I glanced over to see a PHOTO RADAR TICKET with HIS name on it.  OK, I laughed out loud at my husband.  Not a very supportive wife, I know.

To make an hilarious story short…. we drove down to the court house to view the picture (this was back in the day before they mailed them.)  The kind man handed us the picture and at that very moment Rick was wearing the exact same navy and yellow striped shirt that he sported for the roadway glamour shot.  In the picture he also had on his Top Gun Aviator Ray Ban sunglasses….. which were hanging from the front of his navy and yellow striped shirt.  I barely held in a giggle.  “I don’t think it looks like you,” I reassured my lawbreaking husband. 

He did the crime and paid the time.  Now what are the chances of showing up in the same clothes weeks later???  It was a moment worthy of Candid Camera.

www.LindaCrosby.com

?#12 from My Sister’s Jar – Family Dinner

What is one tradition you had growing up that you’d like to continue?

Family dinner around the table!  I have always loved this time together as a family.  I remember it vividly from my childhood…. If it was 6:00 p.m. you better be at the table!  We were always there Monday – Friday and sometimes on Saturday.  I recall having many visitors join our family dinners… and enjoy the conversation, the food and the fun as much as we did. 

There were rituals we could expect.  One was the answer to Dad’s question, “Guess what I had for lunch today?”  It was ALWAYS the exact menu that Mom was serving that night.  It didn’t happen too often, but the three of us kids thought it was funny.  It wasn’t a complaint, just a comical coincidence.  There was also the bowl of corn that was repeatedly discovered in the microwave after we finished eating.  And the day-old Twinkies with the black line across the box.  MMMmmmmmm.

There was much instruction given during dinner about appropriate behavior which became known as “vacation behavior.”  That was the utmost level of supreme obedience.  There was conservation topics covered, like the aforementioned toilet paper scrunching discussion, saving water, shorter showers, more wearing of jeans and less laundry loads. 

There weren’t many family dinners that I remember having to endure, except for the night my brother’s new two-tone blue, T-top Corvette got hit.  We all sat in silence pushing our food around our plates, too upset to eat.

I have vehemently guarded family dinner in our home, but much to my chagrin, it has not been as successful as I always imagined it would be.  Schedules seem to interfere…. hockey, work, church….    But I will continue to call the youngsters together with their mother and father and sit, pray, eat, laugh and just BE together around the family dinner table.  I believe it provides stability.  A safe place to belong.  Long live the family dinner table.

It’s Official! WOOOooo HOOOooooooo

April 26, 2008.  My first book signing at Devotion Christian Store in Scottsdale…. makes my heart glad.  All those blood-shot-eye nights in front of the computer diligently trying to tell the quirky family stories …. in less than 400 words … were all a blur today.  Several times I have asked my hubby, in the dark of the night long after we should have been sleeping, if my book is just a stupid little devotional book.  He would chuckle and think I was kidding.  I wasn’t.  Of course he loved my stories… they are about HIS kids.  And my mom loved them, but mother’s love everything their children create.  And my first editor loved the stories, but I paid her to tell me that. :o)

Today as strangers came and picked up my darling pink book, read the stories and then asked for an autograph…. the descriptive words “stupid and little” were washed from my mind. 

The Lord is so faithful at guiding our steps.  The only way to describe this entire journey is the favor of the Lord.  It is amazing to see the hands in which the Lord is putting my book.  Jewish hands.  Unbelieving hands.  Grandmotherly hands. Husband’s hands.  And I am so honored that KIDS are discovering the joy reading the book!  I’m not sure if I would advise that or not.  They could find much fuel for folly.

Thank you to all who believed in me and supported me and loved me.  I am humbled and honored to be surrounded by such amazing people.  XOXOXO

 

Proud Parents :o)

OH!  My website is up!  Yeah, Sarah!   www.LindaCrosby.com  Check it out!

 

Wanna Buy a Piece o’ Junk?

I was away speaking at a women’s retreat in Oregon last year.  My sister lead worship for the weekend and my mother attended as well.  While we were there, my dad called my mom to check in and see how the ladies were doing.  He proceeded to tell her that my husband had bought a golf cart while we were gone.  Our marital limit for spending money without the knowledge of our spouse is set at $50.  It was a guess, but I figured the golf cart was much beyond our unwritten spending rule amount.  Oh, was I ever right.  Rick told my dad that the vehicle was worth $1,300 but he got it for only $500 and was planning on making some money selling it.  Which is all fine and good, IF YOU DON’T HAVE A $50 check-with-your-spouse-limit.  I wondered what kind of a piece-a-junk, Lawrence Welk, 1962 golf cart he found for only $500!  (Have a look for yourself!)

Two days before I was to return home, Rick had to fly to Texas for Flight Safety re-current training.  I knew when his classes were…. and when he wouldn’t be able to answer the phone.  So I called his cell when I could leave a message and made up this story:  (note that he doesn’t know that I know about the golf cart purchase)  “Rick, I found this great set of cooking pots on sale for only $500.  They are normally $1,300.  I was just checking in with you if I could get them.  The sale is today only and the store is closing in about an hour.  If you don’t call back, I’m going to get them because I really need them and this is a great deal. I love you.  Bye.”  Also note the dollar amounts I used.  He never suspected a THING!  I was amazed that I made it through the message without laughing.

Later that night, Rick called.  The first thing I asked was, “Honey, I know we haven’t talked about our spending limit in a long time.  I know it used to be $50, but what is it now?” 

After a long pause, Rick choked out, “$500,” …saving himself!  

“WOW!  What’s gotten into you?  Do you have something to tell me?  Did you buy something?????”  I pried.

He confessed to the golf cart purchase.  I confessed to lying about the pots.  Funny thing was, he told me that he figured I could keep the pots with the profit he would make selling the golf cart.  I should have run out right then and bought some $500 pots….. or $500 of scrapbooking supplies…. or $500 of something.

A few months later, Rick went to Canada to his grandmother’s funeral.  I took the opportunity to put this ad on Craig’s List: “Golf Cart for Sale… Cheap!  Husband bought it while wife was away.  Wife selling it while husband is away.  Hurry!”  That was the weekend I learned that golf carts are legitimate vehicles with pink slips, registration, insurance and specific owners.  Shoot.  It was a valiant try on my part.

He bought it on March 23, 2007.  Why am I telling this story today????  Because on March 3, 2008, three days ago the golf cart was sold and drove away from our house, leaving a HUGE space in our garage which I rapidly claimed!  Wooooo Hoooooo.  Yes, Rick made a profit…. not the $800 he anticipated, but just enough to buy some pots……… hhhhhmmmmm.