Posts Tagged ‘underwear’

Ten-Year-Old Money Management

April 16, 2014

“Mom, my size eight underwear is too tight.  Can we please get me some more?”  Of course this was only uttered in complete isolation from her brothers.  Of course.  She is mortified if I say the word “bra” out loud whether we are alone or not.  It makes me want to work “bra” into every conversation.  Which I am capable of doing, but I’m trying to be the nice mom (in a white bra.)

So off to ROSS we went.  Dress for less.  That’s my idea of a good time.  And Mr. Wallet’s too.  Straight to the back of the store to the girls department we hightailed and bee-lined to the clearance section.  There is ALWAYS underwear on clearance, which I don’t really understand because they don’t go out of season. Ever.  (Well, except for a season in my teenage son’s life when he wore bathing suits for three months…. but I digress.)

chihuahua

BINGO!  Five multi packs to choose from.  All the right size.  All were five pair for $3.  All were cute colors.  All were bikini (which is apparently highly importante for the Colombiana!)  (When she has her first love in college, and he finds this blog, she’s gonna kill me… but that is so far off, I shall continue.)  I wanted to yell, “Sweet Jesus! We scored in the clearance section, folks!” but I did not, only because I noticed something was amiss on my daughter’s face.  She was not as exhilarated as I was with the undies find.  After questioning her dislike for my super saver bargain, she explained that the sudsy, mini yellow Chihuahua in the bathtub pictured on the first pair of panties in the multi pack was no bueno! I countered with an explanation that she could have five pair for $3 and wear the Chihuahua or she could stay snug in her size 8s.  The little doggie grew on her, as I knew he would.  Plus out of the five pair only ONE had the doggie!  The rest were boring… albeit in cute colors.

She was not done. Oh no. The bubbly Chihuahua was not going down without a fight. Turning to the non-sale section, she pointed to some cute sets of pink undies with turquoise lace gracing the top. Seriously, the ones she picked looked like they were strays from the racy lingerie section of the ladies department.  Why do they even make little girls underwear resemble Victoria’s Secret garb? Pointing out the $6 price tag for TWO pair, I asked her how many doggie panties we could buy for six dollars.  She thought for a moment and answered correctly, mumbling defeat, “ten.”

I explained that it is not a wise use of our money to buy two pair of fancy duds when ten serviceable ones would do.  I suggested that if she really wanted the lacy ones, she could use her own hard-earned money. (Insert eye roll here.) Utterly ridiculous! She would not pay $6 for two pair, even though she wanted me to. No way! She even made a little snorting noise in disgust.

And the underwear lesson went down in the history book as a frugal find but a fashion failure. Egads… a bathing Chihuahua… can you even imagine?!? Disgraceful!

 

Monday’s Smorgasbord

June 6, 2011

My favorite words by Nora and the definitions by yours truly:

  1. Teddy Burr (teddy bear):  when a stuffed animal gets under your saddle.
  2. Unnerwhere (undies): what’s that unner there?… unnerwhere?
  3. Peaksa (pizza): when you take a little looksie in the oven door to see if the cheese is indeed melted.
  4. Enbalope (envelope): when you quit eloping earlier than planned.
  5. Austeen (Austin): the new teenage version of her older brother.
  6. Chickenout (check it out): what you do when you are too scared to jump into the cold water.
  7. Heronimo (Geronimo): an old Indian hero – Nora yells this when she jumps into the swimming pool.

Other tidbits of information from today’s saga:  VBS has begun… hip hip hooray!  My mother and I went shopping and out to lunch!  Boooyah!  The colorful fabrics at JoAnn’s caused me to be deeply inspired to CREATE!  I bought a pattern to sew a dress for Nora!  Ohhhhyeah!  I was dismissed from jury duty before they even saw my outfit!  Rockonnnnn! And I got a ticket from a nice officer of the law.  Booo-hisssss!  Traffic school, here I come! No, I wasn’t speeding… the city closed the road that is the closest entrance onto the freeway… and I took it anyway… for the last time.

Spit Wads…. Again {sigh}

March 31, 2010

Sadly, my boys remembered their father’s example from six long years ago regarding the making, aiming and firing of spit wads.  Just Great.  I’m not sure what restaurant we were in when the boys each pilfered extra straw “guns”.  Regardless, the slimy ball wars continued for three days and I keep throwing away any straw I find.  On Sunday night at a concert at church, they actually pulled the straws out of their pockets and started gumming up some paper.  Militant mom confiscated all weapons before havoc was had.  I haven’t seen any today…. day five, so maybe we’re over this annoying ammunition activity.  Here’s hoping!

On Sunday, the height of the spit wad wars, Keeve had a friend over and they, along with Austin, went out front to spit at each other.  That’s really what it is.  Gummy, chewed up paper towel balls fired at one another, but “not at their heads”, so I’m told. 

My dry and thirsty plants in the front yard were calling to me so I ventured out-of-doors to relieve them and happened on the spit wad war.  To my surprise, my five-year-old nephew was also “playing”.  Before I made myself known, I secretly listened to the verbal exchange and rules that were being made.  Here’s how it went down:

5 yo:  Hey, guess what! Can I play with you guys?   (He says GUESS WHAT before every sentence… to keep us guessing.)

13 yo: Sure, you can be the target.

(Laughter by two 11 year olds and the smart alec 13-year-old.)

5 yo:  (naively, cluelessly) Ok, what do I do?

13 yo:  You just run around.

5 yo: (innocently, trustingly) OK!

Enter: Mom… and Auntie Linda, as the case may be.  I see the 5-year-old start to run away from the older boys as he says to me, “Auntie Linda, Guess what! I get to be the target!……… OWWW!  Something hit me on the back of my head.  I felt that!” (turning and glaring at the older boys.) Back to me with joy and glee in his big brown eyes, “They are letting me play with them!….. OWWW!” He reaches up to his neck and pulls off a slimy ball of gnawed on paper towel.

Being the mom, I gave a few pointed instructions… to the older boys and then went to water my parched posies. Raising boys is so FUN!

Side note: a nameless son of mine went to sleep over at a friend’s house yesterday.  He had packed a small bag… really small, so I asked what was in there for his overnight adventure.  “A clean shirt and shorts,”  he replied proudly.  That may seem all fine and good IF YOU’RE A BOY!  “Did you pack underwear or socks?”  “NO!  (with an amazed and shocked tone at how stupid my question was) I’m only going for one night!”  The caveman.  Who raised this kid of mine?  Positively Cro-magnon…. the same scivvies and socks two days in a row!  More than likely, he remembered to put straws in the bag.  Sheesh.

Happy Heart Day!

February 14, 2009

20080324-young-love

Well, Valentine’s Day 2009 went down pretty low-key around our house.  After last night’s super hero conference, I slept straight through until 9:58 a.m.  And I felt like I needed a nap around 5:00 p.m.  My hip flexor muscles are still crying out when I stand or walk.  (It’s NOT funny either.)  Rick was gone most of the day making Pinewood Derby cars with the boys at church and then to Austin’s hockey practice.  He did send me to get a cute hot pink pedicure while he was out.  It’s truly amazing how much prettier you feel when your toes are painted…. and you didn’t have to bend over to do it.  Thanks, Honey!

We planned on dinner and movie tonight, but by the time we were out the door at 7:45, it was too late for both.  We had a romantic dinner at Chipotle…. no, really…. I LOVE it, so it was ok with me.  (Hey, better than a monster truck rally !)  Then we went underwear shopping at TJ Maxx.  Boy, does Rick know how to do it up right.  If you’ve not yet been married 22 years…. THIS is what you have to look forward to.

Quoting Jessica Heath,  “Love is in the air….. hope you have your gas mask!”  <3

?#6 from My Sister’s Jar – New Holiday

February 13, 2008

Mr. Hancock

If you could declare a new holiday, what would it be? How would it be celebrated?

This picture of Thomas Hancock is reproduced from his classic text: ‘The Origin and Progress of the Caoutchouc or India-Rubber Manufacture in England’ (1857).  Who is Thomas Hancock? you ask.  Not only is he a published author, he is one of my most hallowed inventors in history.  What did he invent? you ask.  Well, let me ask you a few questions.

Do you appreciate underwear that stay put in the correct place?  Do you frequently wear a brazier? Does “saggy jock strap” strike fear in your heart? Do you ever wear a ponytail?

If your answer was yes to any of those questions, then you too, have a fond appreciation for Mr. Thomas Hancock’s invention of ELASTIC.  Gone are the days of corsets and draw strings.  Hello girdles and suspenders!  And non-stretchy bathing suits…… just imagine!  Oh, the confines of the common wardrobe before Mr. Hancock worked his wonders.

May 8, 1786 was his birthday, so I think it would be fitting (get it?) to celebrate All Hail Elastic Day on May 7th.  Elastic would be banned on this day.  No stretchy fabrics at all.  What would you wear? Probably nothing UNDER.  Jeans, but only sans spandex.  The purpose behind the banning, is so that on Mr. Hancock’s birthday the following day, we would ALL appreciate his masterminded creation of elastic.

Are you with me?  Can you say ‘control top’? How about ‘tube top’?  Gimmie an E!  Gimmie an L!…….